Retail can be a land of extremes.

Show off your multitasking prowess somewhere away from my register, please.

2000 called. It wants to return its shirt.

Would it kill people to respect our labors just a little bit?

In retail, patience is more than just a virtue. It’s a downright necessity.

Yeah, um … no.

“Look, I’m really slammed right now. Could we talk later?”

Ever feel like you’re not truly being heard?

“I’d love to help you with that, but I have to be somewhere — anywhere — else right now.”

Hey, sometimes you’re just in the zone.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s “The Customers” — here to spin a few of their greatest hits!

Every retail employee would love to be able to stop fake-guffawing at this common customer quip.

One of the scariest moments in retail is when you have to explain that something will cost more.

When this happens, the excitement can be hard to control.

Ice Cube tells us what’s a good day in the world of retail service.

Here’s the look one gets when experiencing one of retail’s most poignant moments of schadenfreude.

Some days, our conversational skills just aren’t there. And when that happens, this happens.

Awk-ward!

Oh yeah, you gotta love those big-box customer service attitudes.

This Sandra Bullock Bird Box capture nicely represents the relationship of some people with recently introduced retail technologies.

In the heat of retail battle, it can sometimes be a struggle to keep your game face on.

Nerves get frayed at the end of a long shift.

It’s like the Michael Corleone quote: “Just when I thought I was out, they puuuullll me back in!”

No matter how badly you want to say these exact words out loud, you really shouldn’t.

Oh, it feels so good.

A few years in retail can change the way you look at people.

Kill them with sweetness.

What the HELL, man?

Please. Don’t. Please. Don’t.

This meme perfectly captures what is probably the single most awkward moment in all of retail.

Some of us are math-challenged. And when customers do this one thing, it makes us nuts.

Star employees always walk a little taller than the non-stars, don’t they?

Why do customers always seem to think you’ve got an Amazon warehouse out back?

Admit it. You feel this way too.

Often, this customer threat doesn’t have the earth-shaking power they think it does.

Working in retail means never knowing when the terrible-customer bomb is going to blow up our day.

In retail, it typically doesn’t take long for angry customers to start, uh, unburdening themselves.

Spongebob coolly deflects another common customer ruse.

When customers do this, you’ll wish you were wearing a hazmat suit.

Oblivious, entitled employees … you gotta love ’em.

Ah, the small but poignant pleasures of retail.

You can see it in his eyes. This one is destined for retail greatness.

Retail’s ultimate jump scare.

Customer service means completely different things to different people.

In their effort to populate each sales shift, sometimes retail managers can become a bit single-minded.

At least once a week, you’ll meet the “zany” customer who breaks off this crusty old retail joke.

Look on my nametag, ye mighty, and despair!

Musafa and Simba offer a poignant insight into the retail work schedule.

Ever have one of these customers? Of course you have.

On a bad day, the retail life can cause severe brain trauma. But they’re not all bad days, people … right? Right?

Employee of the year material here.

It gets real intense out there in the retail war zone.

When customers learn that a familiar adage isn’t necessarily true, they’re shaken to the core.